November 15, 2007
Dog Damnit!
To people that own dogs, or more specifically, to the person or persons who let their small, yappy dog bark all morning:
It's very difficult to get some good peace and quiet in New York City. If you have ever had a conversation with someone living here while they walk around outside, you will undoubtedly hear sirens, horns, helicopters and the constant gab of passerby's. While all this noise pollution is annoying, I understand it. I have even come to expect it, and have a few places along my common routes that I know to be quiet enough to make a phone call and not have to scream in order to be heard. This is just one small price you pay for living in this city.
However, a price I do not expect to pay is my loss of precious, precious sleep because some schmuck left their dog to bark, incessantly, between the ungodly hours of 6-8am this morning. Some small, yappy, puntable pooch caused me and my on-vacation-fiancee a great amount of stress. If you have a dog, make sure it only annoys you during the non-waking hours. This thing yapped like a car alarm, with barks so frequent I began to doubt it was a dog and thought maybe it was construction. Surely no living thing could make so much noise without stopping for air. My thoughts began to turn evil, and I wondered if it's really a crime to silence something that annoying. If 90% of my apartment complex had the same thought, doesn't that become societal standard? We are a community, some may categorize this complex as it's own society. if we, en masse decide that it's OK to murder yappy little dogs, could we be prosecuted?
Fortunately, my alarm went off and I got to leave the bedroom. However, my fiance is still in bed, and I wouldn't fault him one bit if he wrote a stern letter or kicked the owners of said canine.
Posted by lysa at 9:23 AM | Comments (4)
June 18, 2007
Cowardly Broadcasting
Hey, don't you think it's time for television to start airing some intelligent commercials? I do, too. Unfortunately, FOX and CBS both failed at helping to spread a very important message:
Use A Condom!
This NYTimes article details all the umm, details of the situation, and I'll leave it to you to go edumacate yourselves. Here's my point, FOX News refused to air this commercial?
FOX News, the sultan's of sensationalism found an ad about safe sex too scandelous to air.
According to Fox, they rejected the ad because "Contraceptive advertising must stress health-related uses rather than the prevention of pregnancy.”
Fox, who is currently running a "Special Report" entitiled "Brit Hume: Man Could Lose More Than His Pants" is in no position to be making moral judgements on why people should practice safe sex.
Shame on you, Fox News.
The fight is not completely lost, according to the aforementioned article,
"The commercial will run on ABC, NBC and nine cable networks, including MTV, Comedy Central and Adult Swim. Print ads will appear in 11 magazines and on seven Web sites. All will highlight a Web site, trojanevolve.com
Anyone think it's a coincidence that the google ad-words when searching for fox news was:
The Gospel
Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ
and thou shalt be saved. Acts 16:31
www.thegiftofgod.co.uk
Sheesh.
P.S 22 days until my birthday :)
Posted by lysa at 11:19 AM | Comments (2)
December 19, 2005
In & Out of Reality
Sorry for the seriousness of this, but it's come up several times now and I think it should be addressed. A few friends and me have come up with the way our reality works. It works sort of like this:
If you're going to do something that you know will hurt me, at least have the common decency to not let me ever find out about it. If I do not find out about it, I will not be hurt me it. My reality, my happy reality, stays in tact.
Yes, this brings up a lot of issues about honesty for the sake of honesty, I'm aware. It's a potential snag but one I feel confident I can put right with a little more work into the theory.
My boyfriend informed me about a party he would be attending with his work folk, that is no doubt a holiday party, and did not ask me to go. Why, you ask? I have so many reasons running around my head.
I am torn as to how to feel. Sure, fury, rage and scorn freely dance with my dopamine, but is there a side to this I cannot see? Can anyone figure this puzzle out?
If a person is in a room with 300 people who do not know he has a girlfriend, does he,in fact, even have one? Doesn't the majority perception win as the accepted "reality"? Is thhat what we're taught?
I cease to exists in the minds of others when I have a right to. This, pisses me off.
I hate it when my reality gets fucked with.
Posted by lysa at 12:24 PM | Comments (4)
September 23, 2005
You have got to be kidding me.
So, about 4 months ago I move into this fan-fucking-tastic building with my booboo. This is a *nice* building: 24 hour concierge, gym, study room, pool/bar area - super sweet.
About 2 weeks after we move in there is an announcement of "building maintenance". Poeple will be repairing the outside of the building, a sort of preventitive maintence sort of thing.
There are strange men that seemed to have made a home on this mad array of scaffolding and they live outside my living room window. It seems the construction has now travelled outside my bedroom window!
No Problem.
Well, now there is a fucking problem as every morning for the past 2 months I have been awoken by something that can only be the a Tyrannasauru's Vibrator plunging through the depths of a mountain range. This vibration carries its way through ever nook and cranny of my apartment. It follows me into the bathroom, it accimpanies me whilst I make dinner and it is DIRECTLY outside of every window. I used to have a nice little ear outside my window which is now covered with workman's bridges, buckets and assorted loud, vibratory devices.
This morning the vibrator woke me up, except it was accompanied by something so much worse. A radio playing "What is love", at full volumne.
This is not the mood music I was expected.
Grrrr..
Posted by lysa at 11:33 AM | Comments (4)
June 14, 2005
the definitionof red-tape.
Let's start this by saying I have had a very bad day.
I registered for Mat056, the second installment of math for idiots, as required by BMCC. I was told, however, that BMCC is offering, one time only, a deal for return students who need only one more remedial class - you can take MAT056 for free, over something called summer immersion. I learned this in the beginning of May. Classes for Summer I started early in June, and the day to register for immersion was June 14th. See a problem? In case I was not able to qulify for immersion (which i was told I would) I could not take it summer I, as summer I had already started. MAT056 is not available in summer II.
So, shocker shocker, i am not qualified for immersion because I have too many credits I have transferred in. All of you who remember what I had to go through to even GET those credits in, you may now laugh.
So, I plead with the Dean of Student Affairs who says no to me. The mother fucker told me no. Unacceptable.
I then go up to the Math office, surprisingly, they have been rather helpful. Professor Felix told me I have two options: I can either take a class at another school through the permit program, or test out of Mat056.
So, I start researching the permit program. Turns out Baruch (whose phones are mysteriously down) and Staten Island both offer the class I need. Zonino! An Oninoz later after some serious technical issues with the online "easy to use" ePermit website, I call the registrars office. The college does not accept remedial classes from other colleges on the ePermit system, but, what I can do is register as a non-matriculated student for summer II and then xfer it is, but oh no! I already have transerred in the max allowable credits to BMCC. So after some quick thinking I remember that they transferred in Sociology and I don't need it. So now I call the admissions office to REMOVE 3 credits from my record so I can xfer a remedial class of no credit in.
Shoot me.
Will update later with more fucking bullshit.
fuck 'em all. I'm hiring a tutor.
Posted by lysa at 1:58 PM | Comments (2)
February 27, 2005
Take a stab at this!
Let me tell you something...
There I was enjoying my ride home on the 1/9 train after a long, LONG day of classes. The guy sitting next to me is reading "KNIFE" magazine. You'd think this would discourage me from reading over his shoulder, but it does not.
He flips the page and I see this:
I tapped the man on the shoulder and asked if I could get a picture of this ad because I felt the blog entry coming.
I'm trying to figure out if they are assuming that women feel proud when men look at their chest. Does this ad actually encourage this behaviour? I've been tempted to buy a knife to injur the people who stare at my chest.
It is just so unreal to me, how even the most basic of weaponry has to make you think of tits.
Ad Execs, this is disgusting.
Posted by lysa at 12:09 AM | Comments (3)
February 25, 2005
Sorry Dorothy,
We're not respecting your right to privacy any more.
I wish I had found this article in a publication more credible than Newsday, but I did not.
Turns out, Kansas just topped out my shit-list of states, putting AlafuckingBama into second.
Are the contents of what was, or is in our wombs not covered under any privacy act?
http://www.nynewsday.com/news/nationworld/nation/wire/sns-ap-abortion-investigation,0,4255768.story
Posted by lysa at 7:49 PM | Comments (1)
February 24, 2005
Give that Rookie a dildo!
Are they fucking kidding me????
Yesterday, the United States Supreme Fucking Court *refused* to even HEAR an appeal for that unbefuckmelievable law in Alafuckingbama making the sale of sex toys illegal. As if this wasn't enough, they added:
"The law, adopted in 1998, allowed the sale of ordinary vibrators and body massagers that are not designed or marketed primarily as sexual aids. It exempted sales of sexual devices "for a bona fide medical, scientific, educational, legislative, judicial or law enforcement purpose."
I'm sorry, I may need to paste that again. Did that just say that sex toys can be bought for "bona fide medical, scientific, educational, legislative, judicial or law enforcement purpose."??? Yes, yes it did.
You may use a vibrator, "any device designed or marketed as useful primarily for the stimulation of human genital organs." for a law enforcement purpose.
Ladies and Gents, I encourage all of you to go and buy some handcuffs (fuzzy or not) and role play tonight.
Unbefuckingleivable.
Georgia and Texas ( i would, it's just to ofucking easy) are the only other states that have some sort of law on the sale of sex toys.
Next, we're going to have to defend that "Hysteria" is still a medical condition.
Posted by lysa at 12:15 PM | Comments (0)
February 8, 2005
When is 30 inches not 30 inches?
When you're friggen buying pants!
WHat *IS* it with the fucking fashion people?? I get wide leg, flair leg,low waisted, bikini line viewing kinds of jeans.. but when you tell me the wasitline is 30 inches doesn't that have to live up to some, i don't know, STANDARD???
What friggen metric system do these people use?
Ugh.
Posted by lysa at 7:08 PM | Comments (1)
February 4, 2005
How many rooms are there?
Sitting in math class I heard the following:
When you have a negative sign outside of a grouping of numbers, you can get rid of the grouping of numbers by changing all the signs of those numbers to their opposites.
I wondered at this point, how useful this formula could be for my other mathmatical issues. For Instance:
To add another hour on the alarm clock, simple switch the 3rd number in the series with the first. or:
To sucesssfuly balance your checkbook, simply add in an extra 1,000 everytime your balance ends with a .30.
Why the fuck does math get to make rules to make itself make sense? Who made this shit up?
I admit, I am a mathmatical idiot. I'm back in school for the first time in 10 years, and it makes no more sense to me now, than it did, then.
It seem a little too convenient, like the way Spanish verbs just friggen change. "Conjegate the verb by changing the e to a ue."
Posted by lysa at 10:14 PM | Comments (2)